are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
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