chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
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