So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
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