who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
you inspire me to be a worse person
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Randomize
