I am full of burrito and curiosity
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Randomize