you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Randomize
