You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
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