he referred to my room as the tit cave...
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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