I want you more than these girls want KFC
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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