We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
