what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Randomize
