You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
So drunk, too bad you don't want this
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
Randomize
