I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
Randomize
