I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
