I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Randomize
