Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
The beer is more important than you right now.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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