She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
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I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
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