No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Randomize
