Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize
