Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
