Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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