We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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