Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(253): View more from Washington

is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?

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(303): View more from Colorado

Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks

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(919): View more from North Carolina

bitch so ugly she owes me an erection

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(931): View more from Tennessee

a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.

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These 19 Men’s Fashion Mistakes are Unforgivable, According to Women
Read it at the TFLN blog
(412): View more from Pennsylvania

I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...

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(804): View more from Virginia

I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?

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(813): View more from Florida

If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity

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(541): View more from Oregon

I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.

(541): View more from Oregon

We need to stop going to pet stores high.

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

I deleted all traces of him from my phone

(1-814): View more from Pennsylvania

even the dick picks he sent you?

(814): View more from Pennsylvania

no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll

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