What a fucking waste of an outfit
Redeem this text for a blowjob
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
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