So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
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