We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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