So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
She has the best kind of daddy issues
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