don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Randomize
