I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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