Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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