Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Randomize
