I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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