I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Randomize