About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
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