What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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