Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
only if we run a train.
done.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
