I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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