she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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