Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
Randomize
