just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
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