So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize
