I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Randomize