I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone