Porn is love you can see.
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize