I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
Randomize
