So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
