Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize
