oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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