...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Randomize
