This girl is more easily done than said...
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
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