I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
porn star boner night. come get it.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
Randomize
