dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
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