If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
found the other keg... it's in the tree
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
